Anger Management in Men
Many men struggle with the emotion of anger. The struggle can either be one of not being able to ‘control’ one’s anger or conversely not being able to experience how angry one actually is. Anger in and of itself is not a problem as it is simply an emotion. The problem is the choices men may decide to make at the moment they experience the emotion of anger. It can feel at that precise moment like the man has no other alternative and is consumed by anger. The negative consequences of reacting to anger can result in the loss of relationships, employment, health, and overall well-being. In the current North American context anger in men is generally frowned upon and viewed as entirely negative.
As a result, many men work to suppress their emotions of anger or to negate that they experience it. The consequence of negating the presence of anger is generally that the emotion becomes turned inward. Inward anger (often unnoticed) can transform into an experience of depression.
Treatment for Anger Issues in Men
It may be intellectually helpful to understand that the ideal goal is to respond to the emotion of anger with a healthy choice. However, knowing something intellectually does not translate into new behavior. There could be a myriad of reasons why men struggle in particular with the emotion of anger. It is not uncommon for men to have grown up in homes or environments where their primary caregivers displayed anger regularly. Often past hurts or pains can also have negatively affected a man making the use of anger act as a safety mechanism.
Uncontrolled anger is trying to provide a message to the individual experiencing it and it is important to help uncover what that message is. A man is not a bad person because he reacts to his anger. He is simply an individual in pain and it is important to help uncover and work through that pain while concurrently practicing to respond to anger with healthy choices.